I think i’m giving myself an ulcer.

I am NOT responsible for how others live their lives but it seems that my fretting about their choices winds me tighter and tighter.

T gets wasted as many nights as possible. I don’t know how she hasn’t ended up in the hospital with alcohol poisoning. She comes from a family with step mom and step dad and multiple family and she IS only 18 but OY. She’s been dating this guy for a year and tgey planned on moving in together. He got three jobs for the summer…so she got a couple jobs and started hanging out with any boy othwr than her boyfriend. She is ALWAYS hanging out with this guy from work whose relationship with B recently blew up in his face.

Oh and B…yeah that’s a gem of a story too. On and off with the relationship with M…and still hanging out with other guys (out to dinner) when they were dating. Then she goes and works a catering job and meets M…who is the wild guy that shares her vices and she’s off running with him and leaves M in the dust. She’s had panic attacks and had to go home. She drinks til she passes out and tgen drinks some more…and it makes me wonder,just like T… what are these girls running from?!

And i’ve got a boss whose obly response to my concetns at work are “I’m not sure what to do about that” which is just another way of saying “i don’t know,i don’t like conflict (even if necessary) and so I will just do nothing. Fantastic. Seriously,you have been leading 10+ years and that is your response? You have to be kidding me. My respwct has dipped way down with that.

A discontent boils right under the surface and I feel like i’m slowly being overtaken by too much activity and stimuli. I don’t know how to escape that except to sleep and that seems elusive these days.

Probably just the ever so often vlue

I’m also jealous cause one of my friends has a bf and while i don’t want one,i’m still gwtting ovwr A,i understand how it is to pkay second fiddle to someone ekae and realistically she had to put up with sooo much relationship drama from me and i peobably diregarded her but i feel like i have no time to hangnout cauae shes with him or at school. Maybe i’m just selfish…most likely.


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