#FMF – Friend

joining up with our flash mob of writers over at Kate’s place, writing forĀ Five Minutes on one particular prompt. No editing, just letting the words make themselves visible from head to fingertips. Make sure to visit those who have written around you in the link up. its always fascinating for me to see what the same word inspires each person to share!

Prompt: Friend

Its incredibly difficult to ‘be friends’ with a niceĀ single guy who has declared you to be friends only.

It has also been a blessing. But a hard one.

Each time we hang out, I try to think…how would I act if this was one of my girlfriends? But its kind of hard to do, because he’s NOT one of my girlfriends.

Thankful we have a pretty chill friendship and I feel pretty comfortable being myself and I’m so glad because that hasn’t been the case many times in my life.

It has been a strange thing in my life. I’m sure that psychologists would give me some good answers to this, but I’ve always enjoyed being friends with guys more than girls. I’ve had a couple girl friends, but usually had a struggle with those relationships. But I’ve been blessed in my after high-school years to have some awesome guys as best friends.

It also really sucked when both of them found some amazing girls and got married to them. And as I should, that changed everything. But man did I miss them. They knew me better than most people, and suddenly I had lost a very close friend.

The grief from those losses was very deep.

In some sense, I seem to daily wait for the abrupt finish to this relationship. For another girl to come along and catch his eye as girlfriend material, and then everything will change.

I know better than to open myself up like this. I know better than falling for someone like this. someone with whom I seem to not be on the radar as anything other than a friend.

Seriously though…I’m OLD enough to know better. And yet, here I find myself.

i think its a bit selfish honestly. I think it kind of goes both way. We meet a need in each other without the messiness of commitment.

Tell that to my infatuation

END

five minute friday

 

Advertisements

#FMF – Abandon

Joining with those who write at Kate’s place, as we are united in writing over one word, though our particular journey’s reflected are so unique. write for five minutes, let it all out on the page, and make sure to stop and see what others have to say about the same prompt. Love my people who write for #fmf!

BEGIN

She sat cross legged on the moss covered rock. Her fingers feeling the rough edges of growth on a smooth surface not meant to sustain life. it was a soft place to land, where if she had chosen a different rock she might have been uncomfortable with its hardness. There was a barrier here. Something that had grown up…and she now sank deep into its folds.

it was quiet here. she had removed herself from the sounds of the city, which often overwhelmed her sensitive nature. it all felt like pollution piling into her ears, breathing it in through conversation and out through tears of frustration. this was the place she knew to come to in order to be refreshed.

the quiet wasn’t truly quiet. but it was a change from the chaos of the rest of life. the wind made the branches sway and their creaking filled her ears. The birds had begun their spring time chattering, and the songs began to gather around her. she felt them as an embrace, a call to come and join in.

lifting herself from the moss covered stone, she stepped forward under the swaying branches into the patch of light that had entered this sacred space. She closed her eyes, and listened to the melody that had begun to fill her senses, that as she breathed in began to fill her with light, with breathe, with peace

she heard the note that was her cue to begin. as she raised her arms, she began to sway and her feet moved of their own accord. She was lost in the music of the forest around her, and she had been filled up with its tune. She had become abandoned to the song, to the dance, to the quiet.

END
five minute friday